The Reason Behind the War
by ChibiQuatre
Summary: From Duo's POV about the war; why they're fighting and for what reason...


# The Reason Behind the War

by ChibiQuatre  (6/5/00)   


Yet another GW disclaimer: well, do you all REALLY want me to write a disclaimer?! We all know that I don't own GW (though God KNOWS I wish I did!). The GW boyz r'nt mine, never were, never will b. They are owned by their respective creators; Sunrise, There...happy!!! ((oh, and any trouble translating the japanese, I'll b happy to help!))

  


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I let out a huge yawn and stretch myself as I sit up in the large bed, refreshed from a good nights sleep. _Man, this is what I've been missing all these years. _I glance around his room, one of the many guest rooms of the grand Winner Estate. The sun was already shining through the windows. _I better get up._

  


I jump out of bed, brush and plait my chestnut-brown hair, and toss on my usual priestly wear, then proceed to walk down the stairs. I pass the other rooms, and hearing busy chatter in the kitchen, note that everyone was already up and ready for breakfast. As I enter the kitchen, Quatre greets me. "Ohayo Duo. Sleep well?"

  


You know, I'm always surprised by the blond Arabian's cheerfulness, especially in the hours of the early morning. Quatre's sunny disposition was rivaled only by Duo's. "Ohayo minna," Duo answered. "Quatre, that was the best night I've had in a looong time. Remind me to visit you more often." Quatre looked pleased.

  


It took me a minute to notice that Heero was missing. He smirked. The Japanese pilot was no doubt poking away at his computer. Heero had been uptight lately. _It was because we should be expecting another mission soon. _I sighed inwardly. 

  


Seeing my gaze flicker over the empty space at the breakfast table, Trowa said, "Heero got called away on a mission. He should be back around noon." 

  


'Ah. Sou ka,' I thought. It's about time. God forbid, those empty-eyed scientists actually gave all of us a moment's rest! I grimly wonder, if living under these circumstances, one could acquire a heart condition early. 

  


"A pity really," commented Wufei. Quatre nodded. "We're all going swimming today." I listened, surprised. God I was dense sometimes! Sitting next to them, and not even realizing that everyone had a towel and were wearing swimming trunks. Wufei glared under my gaze, but spoke jokingly. "You realize I'm only doing this because I've never seen a body of water that large?" The trio opposite me laughed, even Chang Wufei. I was stunned the Chinese soldier had mirth in his soul. _I wonder how long he's been able to laugh?_

  


Actually, I wondered when this war would be over.

  


So we, all five of us, can finally enjoy our childhood lost. Lost to the war in which each of them was the pilot of a mobile suit, carrying the heavy burden of peacekeepers of space and the colonies.

  


When one thought of it, it was all like an endless waltz. I smiled grimly at the analogy. The waltz of death. How appropriate that Shinigami, the God of Death, associated himself with the waltz of death. Nothing ever mattered in war, where the stakes were high and the losses great. War courted men, and men accepted with eyes ready and guns loaded. 

  


I can almost laugh at myself. Could it be that I was slowly regretting my choice to fight? _Iie, not me. Not the great Shinigami. _As Heero would say, I sometimes _am _a baka. But I can't help feeling a little remorseful, especially when I knew that we were'nt normal children...none of us. All of our innocence, well, save for Quatre's, was stolen by the war. I looked around the table, eyes settling on each of my friends' faces, lost in thought. _The others, _I thought, _they all have something worthwhile to fight for, to protect. _

  


Heero fights for the love of war. Heh, the perfect soldier. But under his cold mask of indifference and apathy, I have the feeling that Heero fights for more. Deep down, he fights for peace and his colony, L1. Or maybe he fights for revenge, against those who turned him into a cold-blooded killer, a tool of war. Or maybe his heart was hardened by a story he told me long ago, about one of his earliest missions. He had said that it was his worst mistake. He had knowingly killed an innocent. She was little, and always carried a teddy bear in her adoring little arms. That night, Heero detonated the surrounding buildings and the entire area was leveled to rubble. Later, as he had gone from building to building, he saw the girl's teddy bear, covered with soot and lying half buried in the wreckage. It made me sad to think about it, and more than a little angry at the scientists who had built the killing machines, the Gundams.

  


Those scientists had turned a human into a cold heartless killing machine.

  


K'so.

  


My thoughts wandered to the acrobatic pilot. Trowa may seem impassive and calm, but I know why he's fighting. To protect Catherine, his friends, his identity. I can only imagine how he felt back when he was Nanashi, 'No Name.' No name, no family, no friends, not even a place to call his own. Trowa fights to protect the things that war gave him. Sometimes when I capture a glance from those eyes, carefully guarded by the Mask of Nanashi, I understand the pain and suffering he went through to get where he is today. 

  


Duo's brow furrowed. And where exactly was Trowa in the game called Life?

  


Duo almost grimaced when his gaze fell on Quatre. Now, if there's anyone who wouldn't be here in this war, it's Quatre. It astonished Duo more than anything, once he got to know the young heir, that the platinum-blond Arabian would be piloting a Gundam in the war. He loved peace and hates fighting, yet he'd sacrifice his innocence and purity for peace and justice. Somehow though, Quatre managed to fight and keep his dignity at the same time. I can see it in those sapphire eyes. Quatre fights partly as revenge for his father's wrongful death, and partly because he's got it in his little head that we can make a difference; that the five of us can win against OZ and the Romefeller Foundation. 

  


Can we?   


I don't know, but people like Quatre are rare: a dime a dozen. I think I'd fight to protect those innocent souls who still grasp for hope of a bright and sunny future.

  


And last but not least, Wufei, the 'Solitary Dragon.' He also told me a story of him and his wife. Married? Wufei? Yep, better believe it. Her name was Meiran, betrothed to him at the young age of only 14. Ever wonder where Wufei's justice rants come from? Well, Meiran demanded justice out of everything in life; I guess some of it rubbed off on Wufei, although I'm not sure he fights because he wants to carry out their lost dream of justice, or because he feels guilty about not being able to protect Meiran when those OZ mobile suits attacked his colony. Either or both I'll accept. 

  


Strange...the way Chang talks of it, it sounds like his wife was stronger than he was. 

  


Masaka.

  


But me? What exactly am I fighting for?

  


I look at the temporarily calm faces of my comrades, my fellow pilots, dare I even say, my friends. Something stirs in my heart, but doesn't show through my own mask of Maxwell-cheeriness. I know why I fight. I fight for Father Maxwell, the kind Sisters, and most of all, Solo, my first friend, whom OZ killed dishonorably and ruthlessly. OZ killed them all, decimating the entire Maxwell church while they were at it. 

  


I chuckled dryly, drawing a glance from both Quatre and Trowa. I ignore them and they eventually go back to their happy chatter. God, I'd bet Father and the kind Sister would be happy to see what kind of murderer I've become throughout the years. Father Maxwell always believed that everyone had a little good in him, even me. The Sister stood right by him, and declared her trust by giving me the gold cross I wear around my neck. Well, I'm sorry to disappoint you Father, Sister, but it looks like I turned out to be just as much of a killer as those OZ soldiers who destroyed our lives were. 

  


"What're YOU looking at Maxwell?" Wufei's voice rings out in the quiet kitchen. I blink, stunned, as I realize I've been staring at everyone in turn. I haven't been thinking out loud, have I?? Apparently not. Quatre and Trowa are just sipping tea, reading reports of our last mission. Quatre looks pleased. He's sitting there with a smile plastered on his radiant little face.

  


"Ne! Duo," Quatre calls at me. I look up. Wufei and Trowa are standing, looking at me expectantly. "Huh?" I ask.

  


"Baka," Wufei says. I snort at him, and Quatre stifles a giggle. Trowa pipes up, "We're going to the pool for a swim. Are you joining us?"

  


I consider it, but shake my head instead. It would be a good idea to relax, but all that thinking I did wore me out. I chuckle. Maybe I really am a baka. Imagine that...Duo no baka. 

  


Quatre's looking at me a little funny, like he knows something. He motions for the others to go on first, and they gladly oblige. I stand next to the open door, made of glass, and watch my friends jump in Quatre's oversized pool.

  


"Duo," Quatre says. "You've been thinking a lot lately. What's on your mind?" 

  


I look at the blond stunned. Sometimes, I curse his Uuchu no Kokoro. How does he and his Space Heart manage to do these things? I've heard of mind reading, but soul reading?? I haven't even been around Quatre that long, and yet he still reads me as clearly as the reports, sitting openly on the table.

  


I look at Quatre, and he's gazing at me levelly, his eyes voicing his concern. I shake it off nervously and cover up with my happy-go-lucky mask. "It's nothing Quat-man. Don't worry over the likes of me."

  


Quatre seems a little worried; his eyes are clearly telling me to relax. Other than that, he does not push the subject further. Instead, he gets a mischievous smile, and shoves me. Hard. I stumble out the open door leading to the pool, as an idea crosses my mind and hits me like a freight train. "Oh noooOOOO!" I cry as Quatre gives me another shove. I land in the pool with splash. When I surface, Wufei splashes me indignantly. I choke for the second time and he laughs. "Justice is served."

  


When I finally manage to right myself in the water, I notice that Quatre is still standing on the edge of the pool. I look at myself. My black attire is drenched, and my braid is soaked. I sigh. What the hell, I think. Just to scare the Arabian, I get this manic shine in my eyes. Quatre recognizes it as the look of Shinigami, and backs away from the pool as I swim there. But he gets frightened easily. Not much fun after a while. As I reach the edge, I take off my gold cross and lay it down to dry. Quatre relaxes and laughs as he sees I haven't come to take him to the Afterlife. 

  


"Loosen up, Quat-man!" I yell, and dive underwater, only to resurface with a splash in front of Wufei. He's looking more than a little annoyed. "Get out of my face Maxwell," he mutters. But even he's looking a little more friendly and even a bit amused, compared to his usual Justice Boy routine. I laugh, and Trowa joins in. Soon, Wufei and Quatre are laughing. 

  


This wasn't so bad.

  


Heero returned home from his mission, only to find the Winner estate empty and deserted. He narrowed his eyes, wondering if something had happened. As he neared the kitchen, he heard the sound of laughter. Loud laughter. Bakas, he thought.

  


Upon reaching the kitchen, he glanced out the open glass door. Duo, Trowa, and Wufei were splashing around in the pool. Quatre, where was that blond boy?

  


As if reading his thoughts, Quatre materialized behind him, dressed in swim trunks and carrying a tray of assorted sandwiches and drinks. "Konnichiwa Heero. How did your mission go?" 

  


Heero answered, "Ninmu karnyuu," although the fact that Heero looked fine and unhurt meant the answer was probably a 'yes.' Quatre sighed...typical Heero answer. "Yokatta," Quatre said, "If you'd like, you can join us. We're out near the pool." And with that, Quatre turned and walked briskly out the door.

  


Heero stared after the bright boy. As Quatre stepped outside, the laughter got louder. Heero strolled outside leisurely, ignoring his fellow pilots as their happy racket continued. 

  


As far as Heero could tell, there was nothing to laugh about. _They're all a bunch of bakas. _He glared at the lively group, splashing and floundering in the pool, then stepped back inside the house.

  


I stared at Heero's retreating figure and sighed inwardly for the second time that day. Ah well. I'm having fun. If Heero doesn't care to join us, it's his loss.

  


Despite this, I couldn't help but feel a sharp pang of regret and sorrow for the perfect soldier.

  
  
~*OWARI*~   
  


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*NOTE~~In case anyone is wondering, yes, that fic DID have some importance. For any readers out there who didn't understand, what I was trying to show was the regret that the pilots were carrying around, what with having to grow up in your pre-teen years and fight in wars. 

I did it from Duo's POV because, well, cuz I have a friend who luvs Duo. (I did this for you PandahBoi cuz I knew my poetry isn't half as good as urs! lol) Thankfully, this worked out pretty well, better than I thought it would! Yea!!! ::pats herself on the back::

  
  


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Whew! ::sighs:: Thought I'd never finish that! Well, now that I'm absolutely done, pleez pleez PLEEZ tell me what'cha all thought? Any questions, comments, (no flames pleez ^^*) feel free to e-mail me, or IM me if u have an AOL account. I'm always open to suggestions! Ja ne!!!

  


ChibiQuatre @ tigerlily6c@aol.com

  
  


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